LAST WEEKEND
Chest x-rays: DONE. No blood clots. That's just super. It's hard to stretch out like a ballerina when you're wearing a lead apron.
Hair: CUT. Picture to follow below. My barber Rex was impressed by my grades and tells people that I'm going to be a rocket scientist. He is a doll.
Sunday: CHARITY. I wrangled in
shinikius and
sakibombshell to come with me, but not
mko for she had the plague. We got to my office at 7 a.m. where I showed them my desk of misery and my snowglobe pen of not-misery and my GIANT INBOX THAT IS ACTUALLY LARGE TABLE COVERED IN PAPERS. I win for biggest inbox.
The actual charity event was rather poorly organized, and it seemed like we did a lot of sitting around. I mean, there was actual physical labor on our part, but the whole event was largely too many volunteers and not enough direction. Shinikius says that this is what working for the Salvation Army during the holidays was like. I suggested we all do a soup kitchen next year instead.
I discovered at the event that all volunteers were required to wear a red shirt with "Jesus is the reason for the season" printed on it. I take the fact that Sakibombshell and I did not burn to death when we put the shirts on to be proof that God loves heathens.
WE EVEN HAD SHINIKIUS SNAP A PICTURE OF US SAYING "CHEESE-US", AND NOTHING. I think I will create a new proverb for Miscellatheism that states "What humans call blasphemy, God calls comedy".
Post-charity: THE HISTORY BOYS. I think the movie was trying to communicate two things: 1) Oxford and Cambridge are overrated, and 2) all British schoolboys, past and present, are either gay or bi-curious. A good movie, though. It made me want to see the play, so apparently I must have enjoyed it.
THIS WEEKEND (SO FAR)
Ballet:
THE NUTCRACKER. (or as my mother called it, "The Man-hater") The tickets were my gift for Shinikius and Sakibombshell and Mko (who did not have the plague this time!), and we went to a matinee showing at Phoenix Symphony Hall. Even though we were last row center, PSH is such a well-constructed venue that we still had a fantastic view. I wish I could describe how beautiful the costumes and the sets were, but all I've got is "It sure LOOKED like a $1.8 million production".
I want Russian Trepak dancer action figures.
When we left the venue at about 4, the bells at St. Mary's Basilica were playing "Noel". The combined force of the bells and the ballet were enough to kill the Scrooge in me for a little while. I wasn't ready to go home (which means that no one else was either, at least in my mental universe), so we strode off towards the basilica, which has a gift shop. I never noticed the gift shop before. For that matter, I never noticed all the bronze statues of dancing nudes in front of the Herberger Theater before. I commented on the fact that most of the statues were female, and Mko suggested that this was so that the sculptor wouldn't have to mould too many bronze penises. A good point. I'm glad that the bronze statues of Pope John Paul II, Mother Theresa and St. Francis at the basilica were fully clothed.
We went past the basilica to Heritage Square because I was hoping to stop by the Teeter House, but they were closed. Way to not put up any "closed" signs during your regular hours of operation, Teeter House! If you did not have the greatest chicken salad and strawberry shortcake and chocolate espresso tortes on the planet, I would SO be boycotting you right now! WHY WON'T YOU LET ME LOVE YOU???
So we walked back towards the PSH and ate at The Matador. It's a damn good thing
alliath came to visit in October, or else I might have passed up The Matador and gotten stuck with Pizzeria Bianco instead.
Oh, and I gave Mko the Jesus shirt. She doesn't like the slogan so much, but she's a big fan of the J-man, so I think she'll appreciate it more than me.