(no subject)
Oct. 3rd, 2006 08:15 pmMike Beardsley died yesterday morning at 7 a.m.
I'm coping very well in my airtight fallout shelter of extreme denial. I think I cried more when he was alive and fighting the cancer than I have since he died. Maybe it will finally hit me at the memorial service. Then I can be angry with myself for doing homework over the weekend instead of going to visit him, because I was so sure he'd be here this weekend. I can be angry about our plans to go to the zoo, always talking about going to the zoo and never actually going. For now I'll just be angry for no reason, as is usual.
I'm coping very well in my airtight fallout shelter of extreme denial. I think I cried more when he was alive and fighting the cancer than I have since he died. Maybe it will finally hit me at the memorial service. Then I can be angry with myself for doing homework over the weekend instead of going to visit him, because I was so sure he'd be here this weekend. I can be angry about our plans to go to the zoo, always talking about going to the zoo and never actually going. For now I'll just be angry for no reason, as is usual.